Shenanigans

I hate cities.

Okay, well that isn’t entirely true.

I hate standing in any of the major cities in Warcraft. Depending on the character I am on, I will get persistent tells for gold, summoning, porting, instance run-throughs, healing, or joining a guild (why won’t Blizzard make it so guild charter petitions are blocked by ignore?  Arg!).

What if there was a way to take all that aggravation and turn it into amusement?

At the risk of sounding like a horrible late night infomercial: NOW THERE IS!

Automatic Goblin Therapist is there to turn the worst conversations into the best ones!  This isn’t just another lame add-on that makes you talk like a troll or a pirate.  No, this is actually smart, and does almost all the work for you.  You just have to sit back and be entertained.

How does it work?

When the add-on is installed and loaded, there will be a small black box on your screen with space for two lists: “Waiting Room” and “Surgery.”

When someone whispers you and isn’t on your friends list, they are placed onto a “waiting room” list.  If this person annoys you in any way, all you have to do is left-click their name to move them to the “Surgery” list.

Did you move a person to surgery?  Now the fun begins.

The Automatic Goblin Therapist (AGT) will go to work, chatting up the hapless fool who had the nerve to bother you on your precious time. It will ask them annoyingly reflexive questions every time they whisper you until either: 1) you tell it to stop (by left-clicking on their name in the surgery list) or 2) the person stops whispering you or 3) the person ignores you.

Further Information:

AGT is based on ELIZA, an artificual intelligence program designed to parody a Rogerian therapist, largely by rephrasing many of the patient’s statements as questions and posing them back to them.

I did not design this add-on!  I am just really amused by it. :) The add-on was developed by Duugu (on WowInterface), who converted a java-based implementation of ELIZA into LUA code for the add-on.

Standard disclaimer

The add-on doesn’t work if you are afk or dnd, even if you have moved someone to the surgery list.  It will not automatically start responding to anyone who whispers you.  You have to actively move a person to the “surgery” list to get it to talk for you. There is a minimum level of interaction necessary to make this work.  This is NOT a fully automated bot that violates WoW’s terms of service.  It’s just an add-on that says funny stuff if you tell it to.

Get the Add-on!

Go turn the worst conversations into the best ones with Automatic Goblin Therapist!

… and if you want to find out what happens if you make AGT talk to itself, read on!  (Yes, it does devolve into an endless loop!)

<<Self>> whispers: Hi
To <<Self>>: Hi
<<Self>> whispers: How are you today.. What would you like to discuss?
To <<Self>>: How are you today.. What would you like to discuss?
<<Self>> whispers: Have you asked such questions before?
To <<Self>>: Have you asked such questions before?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  prefer if you was not?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  prefer if you was not?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
To <<Self>>: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Did you come to me because you are ?
To <<Self>>: Did you come to me because you are ?
<<Self>> whispers: What makes you think I am ?
To <<Self>>: What makes you think I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: How long have you been ?
To <<Self>>: How long have you been ?
<<Self>> whispers: Are such questions on your mind often?
To <<Self>>: Are such questions on your mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: What about your own mind often?
To <<Self>>: What about your own mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: Are such questions on your mind often?
To <<Self>>: Are such questions on your mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you concerned about my mind often?
To <<Self>>: Why are you concerned about my mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: What do you think?
To <<Self>>: What do you think?
<<Self>> whispers: What answer would please you the most?
To <<Self>>: What answer would please you the most?
<<Self>> whispers: Have you asked anyone else?
To <<Self>>: Have you asked anyone else?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
To <<Self>>: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Did you come to me because you are ?
To <<Self>>: Did you come to me because you are ?
<<Self>> whispers: Does it please you to believe I am ?
To <<Self>>: Does it please you to believe I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Do you enjoy being ?
To <<Self>>: Do you enjoy being ?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
To <<Self>>: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: How long have you been ?
To <<Self>>: How long have you been ?
<<Self>> whispers: What answer would please you the most?
To <<Self>>: What answer would please you the most?
<<Self>> whispers: Have you asked anyone else?
To <<Self>>: Have you asked anyone else?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
To <<Self>>: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Did you come to me because you are ?
To <<Self>>: Did you come to me because you are ?
<<Self>> whispers: What makes you think I am ?
To <<Self>>: What makes you think I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Do you believe it is normal to be ?
To <<Self>>: Do you believe it is normal to be ?
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  believe it is normal to be?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  believe it is normal to be?
<<Self>> whispers: Say, do you have any psychological problems?
To <<Self>>: Say, do you have any psychological problems?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  not you?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  not you?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  not you?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  not you?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
To <<Self>>: Perhaps in your fantasies I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Do you believe it is normal to be ?
To <<Self>>: Do you believe it is normal to be ?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
To <<Self>>: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Did you come to me because you are ?
To <<Self>>: Did you come to me because you are ?
<<Self>> whispers: What makes you think I am ?
To <<Self>>: What makes you think I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: How long have you been ?
To <<Self>>: How long have you been ?
<<Self>> whispers: Have you asked such questions before?
To <<Self>>: Have you asked such questions before?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
To <<Self>>: Why are you interested in whether or not I am ?
<<Self>> whispers: Do you enjoy being ?
To <<Self>>: Do you enjoy being ?
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  enjoy being?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  enjoy being?
<<Self>> whispers: Tell me more …
To <<Self>>: Tell me more …
<<Self>> whispers: Come, come, elucidate your thoughts.
To <<Self>>: Come, come, elucidate your thoughts.
<<Self>> whispers: What about your own thoughts?
To <<Self>>: What about your own thoughts?
<<Self>> whispers: What else comes to mind when you ask that?
To <<Self>>: What else comes to mind when you ask that?
<<Self>> whispers: Are such questions on your mind often?
To <<Self>>: Are such questions on your mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: What about your own mind often?
To <<Self>>: What about your own mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: What answer would please you the most?
To <<Self>>: What answer would please you the most?
<<Self>> whispers: What do you think?
To <<Self>>: What do you think?
<<Self>> whispers: Are such questions on your mind often?
To <<Self>>: Are such questions on your mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: Why are you concerned about my mind often?
To <<Self>>: Why are you concerned about my mind often?
<<Self>> whispers: Does that question interest you?
To <<Self>>: Does that question interest you?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: We were discussing you, not me.
To <<Self>>: We were discussing you, not me.
<<Self>> whispers: Oh…  not you?
To <<Self>>: Oh…  not you?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?
<<Self>> whispers: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
To <<Self>>: You’re not really talking about me, are you?
<<Self>> whispers: Would you prefer if I were not ?
To <<Self>>: Would you prefer if I were not ?

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5 Responses

  1. Hehehe, that is a wonderfully great mod!! Nice find!

  2. I love it… I don’t often get hassled, but I must have this….

  3. ^^ Figures a gnome would go for this one. ;)

    Heheh…a really good find. I wonder if I can use it with pestering guildies… :p

  4. […] Dwarf Priest has a post on Shenanigans that made me laugh.  That is a very mean addon to spring on someone, but the punishment fits […]

  5. […] of Goblins, Dwarf Priest brought a Mod to my attention, Automatic Goblin Therapist for dealing with those random whispers […]

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